# Tonight, on a very special episode of Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense

The title is a reference to cheesy network television special shows.

## From Reign of Terror

The Reign of Terror is the name given to the rule of King Terror the First of Groclant, a kind man who was loved by all.

### Controversies

People were scare d of kking Terror becauswe of his name. But then he murdered them,

'A Richard Nixon mask is a mask with the features of U.S. President Abraham Lincoln. Why it's called a Richard Nixon mask, I don't know.

## From School for the Collective International Workers Union

White Bear Lake Area High School, abbreviated WBLAHS, is a high school in White Bear Lake. It is commonly referred to by its colloquial name, School for the Collective International Workers Union, abbreviated SCIWU. The school was formed by merging White Bear High School and White Bear Lake Mariner High in 1983, and currently consists of two campuses: North Campus, with grades nine and ten; and South Campus, with grades eleven and twelve. WBLAHS is the only school in the state of Minnesota with grades 9-10 and 11-12 in different buildings. It is also the only high school in Minnesota that advocates total adherence to communist values. WBLAHS is currently involved in a vicious guerrilla campaign with its arch-rival school, the Academy of National Socialism of North St. Paul. In addition to this, WBLAHS is in the process of purging its ranks for White Army members, sworn enemies of the Proletariat and of communist values.

## From the transport section of Maastricht

Antipodean Express Elevator; It is a little known fact that the Netherlands is linked to the South Pacific by a direct elevator running through the Earth's core. One end of the 11,000 km shaft is located in a pub toilet in central Maastricht, and the other emerges behind a telegraph pole at Shorncliffe station in suburban Brisbane, Australia.

Opened in 1974 as a means of quickly spreading rumours, bad news and urgent Nigerian investment opportunities, the elevator remains the swiftest means of transport in the world. A one-way trip takes just under three and a half hours, with the lift car travelling at two and a half times the speed of sound. The car was designed to carry up to 800 kg of bills, reposession notices and P45s, leavened with a sprinking of bad cheques and divorce papers and topped with the odd food scare or bird flu panic. So it just goes to show, proverbs are true. Bad news travels faster than anything else on earth. And when the wind changes, your face *will* get stuck like that.

As the elevator was eventually rendered obsolete in this regard by the growth of teh Internets, its secretive owners decided to begin accepting passengers. The lift car is now fitted with six seats. As it uses the Earth's own gravity for propulsion, along with a large rubber band at each end to speed up the launch, there are no fuel costs and the fare has remained very reasonable at one immortal soul. This does not have to be your own, but must be delivered in person before boarding.

Current chairman of the Board of Directors, reigning Prince of Darkness Beelzebub XIV von Battenberg-Sachertorte, wishes all travellers a safe journey and thanks them for choosing to fly Wikipedia. You will find parachutes in the liferaft.

## From Dr. Drakken

Someone gave the Kim Possible villain a new (and nonexistant) relative.

### Drametia

Drakken and Shego's daughter or first experiment. She is 3-years-old but has the brain of a 32-year-old. In countless episodes she has a crush on Ron! She is either seen with a green sweater, pink shorts, and white shoes or purple overalls, blue shirt with a bear on it, and purple sneakers. In some episodes when she isn't paying attention she watches Rated-R movies. In Season 4 epsidoe Mad Dogs v.s. Aliens Drakken gets back in his lair and it's a mess thanks to Drametia. Drametia hates Kim so much more than her dad.

## From Mark Foley

In late 2000, Foley played a large role in aiding George W. Bush during the Presidential election recount controversy in Florida [1]. He was rewarded for his loyality by being give a lead role in the White House's "No child's behind left alone" initiative.

## A most queer use for barnstars (From User talk:A Man In Black)

 The LGBT Barnstar For your tirless efforts in gay editing, I award you the LGBT barnstar. True ozzy 23:41, 22 March 2007 (UTC)
That is the classiest insult ever. - A Man In Bl♟ck (conspire | past ops) 02:26, 23 March 2007 (UTC)
I love it, thats hilarious. Maddie was here 20:29, 28 June 2007 (UTC)

## The Rock The Power and The Roll

The Rock The Power and The Roll were one of the biggest grossing hard rock bands of the modern era. Attracting controversy, admiration, love and loathing from all walks of life and origin. The band reportedly sold over 100 million records during their career and sold out record tours across multiple continents.

The ROCK, The POWER & The ROLL were formed in 2005 and quickly rose to have a strong local following, particularly amongst the female community aged 15-35. Drummer 'The ROCK' was involved in several scandals ultimately ending in the infamous News of the World libel trial.

By 2006 the band had grown to be known as The ROCK, The POWER, The THUNDER, The LIGHTNING & The ROLL. This trend to add members to the band, seemingly every time a social event was held had a significant impact on the distribution of royalties, with the band having over 40 member at various times. The only consistent theme was The ROCK, The POWER & The ROLL. With other members such as 'The SHADOW, The BEAST, The THUNDER, The NOISE, The ANIMAL, The LIGHTNING, The FREAK, The MUSIC' to name but a few, not lasting more than a few months at best.

2008 saw the now legendary FLAMES tour, taking in venues such as Times Square, The Nou Camp, the North Pole and culminating in a show OUTSIDE of Wembley Stadium as Bon Jovi played inside. The crowd arriving to watch Bon Jovi chose instead to watch the The Rock, The POWER & The ROLL, only 12 fans actually going inside the watch the American pop rockers.

In 2010 after gaining headlines and some unwanted attention from Greenpeace after playing a gig on the back of a Blue Whale, came the shock news that 'The ROLL' had disappeared in the South American Jungle. The group disbanded immediately and the remaining members embarked on solo careers. The POWER had the most success, notching up a top ten single and an album "The movement within me" that reached #9 on the Billboard Chart. The ROCK explored a darker harder edge and spent some time touring Eastern Europe before a brief stint as a Football manager.

The announcement came on 14 Oct 2015, 5 years on from The ROLL's disappearance, the band would reunite to play a one off gig in the Antarctic, with Axl Rose to replace The ROLL as lead vocalist. A record crowd of 2,300,000 crowded the ice with a further international TV audience of several hundred million watching at home. The band played their recognized hits as the audience rocked, reportedly reducing the ice cap by 22%. Then, as the drums started for the crowd favourite 'Fire, when the Flames have gone', a tiger rode on to the stage, carrying a naked man covered in blood. For the first time in 5 years the world looked into the face of The ROLL. He got to his feet, set the tiger onto Axl Rose as the crowd went wild, then took the mike from his hand. "Ladies and Gentlemen, The ROCK, The POWER and...... The ROLL", The ROCK pounded the drums and The POWER leapt into a 5 minute solo before the words came.. "Will you still sing my song?, When the FLAMES have gone". The sound of the crowd could allegedly be heard from space and astronauts joined in the record world wide audience.

The group retired after the gig and now run a small Rock and Roll museum in Dagenham.

## From the (former) article Rogeiphone

Rogeiphone is the most deadly and stupid bacteria.

Carriers

Mr.Rogers (and his immediate family)

Origin

Rogeiphone has been dated back to the late Jurassic Period. The only evidence that we have of Rogeiphone is from a fossilized specimen of Brontosaurus diharrhea.

Known Cases

Only two cases have ever been reported of Rogeiphone. Both cases were from the two workers at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services who were the ones conducting the experiments on the crap.

Symptoms

Mental retardation, constant voice cracking, reverse of puberty, change of gender, severe acne, ball drops (infertility in women), visions of Italy, lovehandles, paranoia and dysentery.

There are very few known ways that Rogeiphone is spread since it is so rare. The only known ways it can be spread are by direct contact and through HAM Radio signals.

Treatment

There are only three known cures for Rogeiphone. One being Seppuku, a form of ritual disembowlment. Soap and water (Soak for three hours). The final cure is to build your own pyramid with absolutely no help, and the pyramid must be as tall as cumulonimbus clouds. (If it is any shorter then the spirit of the sand will take away your right pubes).

Ways To Prevent Rogeiphone

There are only two known ways to prevent Rogeiphone. One way is to stay away from HAM radios. The second way is to not touch Mr. Rogers crap, which is currently in the Smithsonian Museum in Washington DC. It is in a vault labeled "Contraband". It can only be accessed via the V.I.P. tour.

## From Benjamin Lau

Benjamin Lau is a teacher at Wellington College, a secondary school in New Zealand.

He has become somewhat of a 'cult' figure at the school, due to his jolly appearance, and his inability to tell a student off with out smiling at them. Many at the college know him as the ‘face’ of the school. With his bright eyed, bushy tailed appearance he brightens the day of everyone he meets.

Born of human parents and raised in the wild by a group of fairies, much speculation surrounds the early years of Ben Lau. Some believe his cheery manner and outwardly jolly appearance is directly related to influence from his fairy “parents”. His hobbies include music, bike riding and diving with scuba gear to enjoy the majestic prancing of seahorses in the wellington bay area.

125.22.46.5 12:12, 26 March 2007 (UTC)Bold text

Here.

## Template:Crimethink warning

Recreated once with the edit summary "This template does not need to be deleted, comrades, the great Stalin himself told me to create it."

## Seen on Administrator Intervention for Vandalism

• - Username referring to hate figure (Hitler, not RuPaul). RJASE1 Talk 21:39, 26 March 2007 (UTC)

## Articles created by User:Choolabuuulba

### Peter Smartz

Peter Smartz (or Peter Smartz Withazee) is a fictional character of the animated series Class of 3000.

Peter is a black and white cartoon character back in the 1920's. He is a crazy mime who wants to turn the world into a black and white place for mute people. He was captured and de-blackified and was really human all along. According to Sunny, he is not Peter but Phillip Song.

Smartz/Song is voiced by Tom Kenny.

### The Belwoski Show

The Belwoski Show is an animated series starting Belowski from Yu-Gi-Oh GX and made by Pyramid Games.

#### Epsiodes

• An Unnamed Episode
• Chacca Chacca Choo Choo
• Norman and the Hip-Hop Hog

## from Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Jackie Chan

Non notable meme, possibly fun-craft..

## From User:Yamla by User:Asdfghjkl963

"I was nominated for the NAMBLA (National Alaliance for Man-Boy Love Association) poster child and I won! I should probably link to the appropriate page here."

[3] bibliomaniac15 01:56, 27 March 2007 (UTC)

## Spindel Lejon

Since the dawn of time, man has yearned to crossbreed spiders with lions. Cave-paintings at Lascaux depict spiders and lions being herded into narrow canyons and cave systems. Archaeological evidence suggests that these Spiderlion Runs were then heated with fire in the hope that the two creatures would melt together and emerge as a single beast. It is believed that these early experiments marked the beginning of barbecue culture.

## Classical Period

Demosthenes, in his work Lionspiders and Other Unnatural Beasts, suggested a formula for the creation of Spider Lions which he claimed to have used himself successfully on three occasions. On the first, the Spider Lion killed and ate his nephew Aristaeus. On the second, the creature died almost immediately. On the third attempt, however, Demosthenes managed to engage the creature in conversation for some minutes before the spider and lion halves flew appart "as though propelled by a magical force.

His report of the coversation is as follows:

"I asked the Spider Lion what it knew of the condition of mankind, and of the lands and peoples that live outside the knowledge of civilisation. It replied that there was only one way to find out, and this was by fighting it furiously. At this point it exploded."

## Spider-Lions in America

In 1855, American engineer and inventor Gridley Bryant proposed a method of confining tarantulas inside a lion's carcass, which would then be reanimated by steam power. The device, never built in Bryant's lifetime, was patented as Bryant's Curious Mechanical Engine, and was intended to be used for laying railroad tracks, intimidating unruly domestic slaves, and conquering the Indian tribes of the West. Instead, the first successful Engines were built after the end of the American Civil War, when, during Reconstruction, they were widely seen patrolling the streets of Southern cities, frequently engaging in street battles with the Ku Klux Klan. In 1875, the largest single warehouse of Curious Mechanical Engines was destroyed during a Klan attack on the township of Spider Lion Creek, South Carolina. The explosion also destroyed every copy of Bryant's plans and several of Abraham Lincoln's cousins and friends. After this, the United States Congress passed the Unnatural and Frightening Devices and Contraptions Law, banning American citizens from constructing or importing robotic lions, robotic spiders, or "any combination thereof designed to harass or confuse the citizens of the Republic".

## Spider-Lions in the Arts

The few surviving spider-lions integrated with American society, and are believed to be living in America to this day. Many prominent actors and musicians have been rumoured to be spider-lions, including Sarah Michelle Gellar, Bruce Willis and Marlene Dietrich. The first prominent American actor to publically announce himself as a spider-lion was popular music hall entertainer Spidery Joe Griffiths. After making the announcement at a press conference in 1924, Spidery Joe was quickly immobilised in a web and held at bay with a chair until reinforcements could arrive. Since that time no public outings of spider-lions have occurred.

Spider-lions feature either explicitly or metaphorically in many popular films and musicals. Critics have interpreted West Side Story as a metaphor for the plight of the spider-lion, with the Sharks and Jets a thinly veiled reference to the creature's dualistic nature. An unusually direct reference to Spider-Lions can be found in the Destiny's Child b-side, "I Don't Want No Spider-Lion Man", in which singer Kelly Rowland complains of the male Spider-Lion's supposed propensity for irresponsible drinking and financial waste.

## From rimba ilmu

It is renowned for its speaker farm, where many types of speakers are grown for companies such as Creative Technology, Altec Lansing, and Dolby. The speakers are especially known for the quality of their tweet sound. This comes from their special nurturing in a forest. A microphone and headset farm have been planned.

## From :Template talk:Todo

Did you know?... That there are font activism vandals lurking in Wikipedia? (Sorry, but this BJAODN has to be seen in diff form to be fully appreciated.)

## From Chrysler Sebring

1. REDIRECT Template:Infobox automobile

## Articles created by User:Booooomerang

### Jeanie Meanie Minnie Mo

Jeanie Meanie Minnie Mo is a new episode of the animated series Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.

#### Plot

Bloo found a lamp and rubbed it and out came Jib. He granted Bloo 3 wishes. Then he gave Wilt the lamp and Wilt is in the lamp. Jib went inside a vaccume cleaner gave Bloo 3 more wishes and everything was back to normal. Jib was sent to Canada to see Mac's teacher's uncle. He is crazy with science as she crazy with teaching. Mac's teacher's uncle can't rub the lamp because he's in a straitjacket.

#### Trivia

• First appearence of Jib. Seen in Ed.
• First appearence of Uncle Chuck.
• In this episode Jib weared the #1 shirt as all the other episdoes he wear the Hot Dog Shirt (which is seen in "Dinner is Swerved").
• Jib also resemblance Norm the Genie.

### Astro Jam

Astro Jam is a new cartoon movie based on the Appleday Cartoons. It's also based on Jordan Michaels.

#### Characters

##### Jordan Michaels

A famous basketball player who saw the Appleday Cartoons and help them to play.

##### Golly Gopher

Main Article: Golly Gopher

##### Crocoo

Main Article: Crocoo

##### Dolly Gopher

Main Article: Dolly Gopher

##### Tux the Penguin

Main Article: Tux the Penguin

##### Pickles and Prickles

Main Article: Pickles and Prickles

##### Alienstars

A group of aliens that are the oponents and the slaves of Don McRotten. They can change sizes. They are afraid of the boss.

##### Don McRotten

The boss of the alienstars and he does smoke.

## Excerpt from Streets of SimCity

Streets of SimCity is a 1997 racing and vehicular combat computer game published by Maxis. IT WAS, AND STILL IS, EXTREAMLY UNPOPULAR! The novelty of this game stemmed mostly from the fact that the player could race cars around cities that had been...

## Sandbox?

Shortcuts:
WP:SB
WP:SAND
WP:SANDBOX
WP:TEST
WP:FOO

LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE YOU LIBERALS! There is no excuse for what they've done in Congress. "Support our president" I've said. But you "Americans" consider the lives of our troops more important than the hope of Iraq and the security of our country.

Now, I truly know that whether or not we get a Democracy in Iraq, that they'll revert to the terroristic regime. But we are also keeping them away.

But, I guess there is something good about this cowardly retreat. While the Demoncrats feel victorious, the terrorists will come and bomb our country. I will feel sad for those who are victims, but this is the only way you stupid liberals will see that George Bush was actually doing a good job before you made a personal vendetta against "Right-wing conspirators".

But let me tell you, we could've prevented 9/11. Osama Bin Laden was in our grasp during Bill Clinton's terms. But he let him go.

## Pancakes

My friend keeps going on the site as a "Pancake Ninja" and editing pages with Pancake theme, I shall write an artical on the legend of the Pancake Ninjas, the fluffy crusaders!

"Right-wing conspirators" or just the Liberals.

I may sound like a terrorist, but I want them to hit us again. It may teach our stupid "American" voters to see that THEY ARE GAMBLING, NOT JUST WITH MONEY, BUT WITH SOMETHING THAT MATTERS MORE, THE SECURITY OF OUR SOLDIERS AND OUR CITIZENS. The Liberals have made this war a long Television Event, to not only keep you entertained, but to propagate Liberal ideas. "Today, 4 US soldiers died today in the biggest roadside bomb of the month." Are you tired of that? They are saying the same damn thing over and over again. Well, I am too. I am stressing the fact that the Liberals want to tell you the same damn thing over and over again. They want you to vote for them. Yes. They made this war POLITICAL, instead of leaving war to the military.

Fake news shows. They are funny, but they often make light of serious situations. Personally, there is nothing wrong with using fake news to entertain. But, it is the people watching that have to make a decision whether or not to apply false news. Making fun of politics, sure. Politicians are people, and they tend to do stupid things. It makes us laugh sometimes, we all need to laugh. But like I said, its how you apply the idea of making real serious things entertaining.

Does it work when politicians, who can't agree on a damned thing, take control of a war? THEY ARE THE ONES RISKING OUR SOLDIER'S LIVES FOR THEIR GAIN. Every time in history, when a war is decided through politics instead of LOGIC, the war ended up bad. Personally, I don't give a damn about people who will use children to bomb innocent people. I will state it right here, I hate the Muslim religion. It is a religion based on the racial hate of the Jewish nation, and any nation that isn't ruled by their religion.

## Stand by, I'm shifting topics a little bit

Do you want to be Muslim run? Isn't that bad, right? Eat, drink, and sleep Allah. I have nothing against faith. This is a little inappropriate, but necessary to be mentioned. Most people in our country masturbate. They will kill people who masturbate. Or how about for women? They think of women as objects to bear children, and do whatever the husband says. Women can't show their faces, or any body parts.

Sexual perversion is all about. You see it everywhere. Homosexuality, Transsexuals, Pornography, Incest, Pedophilia. I am not saying it never happened before the media. It's just that it's more rampant now. Why? Not just the Liberal media, but the increase of sexually oriented shows/topics on the television and internet. People get turned on, then do these acts because of what they saw. Now, people can do these things without being started by television/internet. But, the ACLU and many other people are supporting free sexuality. Damn hippies.

## Looping

Hippies not only bring the ideas of free sexuality, but the whole "Make love, not War" thing. Hippies shaped our nation a whole lot. Gosh, I hate hippies. They have wrong off-set ideas that sinful people can ever fully accept the things that go on around them. The thing I really hate about them is that they say all conflicts can and will be solved through talking it through. No. Everyone has a thing that makes them angry or invigorates them. And this area you may not be able to accept anything against your thought or idea. They have supreme stupidity.

Anti-war protests. Gross. America can protest against wars, but make sure they are wars that are pointless. All of the wars that we protested against we necessary. Thus, we can't trust our stupid fellow Americans. Korea had communists, and not only that, but it produced M*A*S*H. Vietnam, once again, was necessary. And how we greeted our returning troops was one for the history books. We greeted them with criticism. It's like saying, "Your brothers and friends deaths were in vain."

To close this up, I have not much to say. I think I said what needed to be said.

## From Buddha and the Seven Ascended Masters vs. Godzilla

 {{{1}}} {{{2}}}

Buddha and the Seven Ascended Masters vs. Godzilla, released in Japan as Gojira ga Bodhisattva niyotte oyobi 7 tsu no joushou sa re ta masutaa ha tatakatte iru (“ゴジラ が菩薩によって及び7 つの上昇されたマスターは戦っている"), is a 1967 daikaiju eiga (Monster Movie). Technically the ninth in Toho Studios' Godzilla series, but is not considered canonical by most Godzilla fans. It was directed by Mikao Usui with special effects by Eiji Tsuburaya and Sadamasa Arikawa. This entry is significant in that Godzilla again takes on the role of villain, after being the "good guy" in the previous few films. It is also the only Japanese monster film which expresses the action in mystical or religious instead of science fiction terms. And of course, it is the only Godzilla film to feature copious nudity and sexual situations.

### Plot

Template:Spoiler In an unspecified future time, society has become corrupt and decadent. A strange cult, believing the only way to save mankind is to destroy it, summon Godzilla from the watery depths. An even stranger Buddhist sect, to save mankind, summons the human forms of Buddha and the Seven Ascended Masters of Theosophy. These 8 beings fuse together to form “Buddha-tron”, a giant stone idol-like robot. Once Godzilla and Buddha-tron meet, the middle two thirds of the film is an extended monster fight scene. At the climactic battle atop Mt. Fuji (looking much different than the last battle in “Destroy All Monsters”!), Buddha proves that Godzilla is merely a manifestation of mankind’s dark sexual nature, causing Godzilla to fade away in a puff of smoke. Buddha and the Seven Ascended Masters, separate beings again, ascend bodily to heaven.

### US Version

With the exception of a bootlegged version shown not more than a dozen times (usually on college campuses), the film has never officially been released in the US. This bootlegged edition is known to differ from the original in the following ways:

• Subtitled, but all subtitles were in fact quotations from the Tibetan Book of the Dead, having no relation to the actual dialog.
• Eight minutes of missing footage towards end of second reel—gap is filled in with a repeat of the previous eight minutes!
• Deleted: closing credits.

### Critical Reception

One reviewer comments: The only Godzilla movie that crossed into the realm of avant-garde and tested all of the limits of cinema. Of course, the ONLY reason most people have never heard of it is because it's just way too OUT THERE. And some of course took it to be a sacrilege. Not to mention, it was a drug-fuelled timebomb of sexual perversion, paranoia, mortality and the restrictions of the personal desires of the indiviual living within the confines of society. It recieved an extremely limited release before it was banned altogether. Now the film maker (and bearer of the original copyright) is withholding wider release due to a religious epiphany he had in the mid-seventies and is rumored to have ordered all copies of the film destroyed. Of course a few remaining unaccounted for illegal copies exist that were smuggled out of Japan that were hidden somewhere in the foothills of the Himilayas until just a few years ago.

### Trivia

• Originally, in the scene where Tokyo is about to be attacked by Godzilla and the Third Ascended Master, Buddha and the remaining Ascended Masters were to be temporarily vanquished and shrunk down to subatomic size. When the director was unsatisfied with the special effects used to depict this, he cut the scene mid-battle, jumping to a scene subtitled “6 Years Later”. No explanation is given for this in the film.
• The only Godzilla film in which the monsters (at least in one scene) are shown to be “anatomically correct”.
• The only Godzilla film never officially released outside Japan. Only a handful of original prints exist, as the director had ordered all copies destroyed. The bootleg version sometimes shown in the U.S. appears to have been filmed by hand from inside a theater.

### Box Office

In Japan, the film sold only approximately 12,000 tickets before being banned altogether.

### References

• Thompson, Howard. Buddha and the Seven Ascended Masters vs. Godzilla (film review). The New York Times. January 15, 1969.

• Cult Films 101: “The Bad Old Weird Ones”

## From Hind hassan

Matt Kennard has since undergone a sex change operation in Tehran and assumed the name 'Hadeel' and is playing a starring role in the groundbreaking Iranian film 'Zir e kun e khar,' 'Under the Donkey's arse.' He plays the arse.

Hitler relocated to the Führerbunker on 16 January 1945, where he presided over the rapid disintegration of his Third Reich as the Allies advanced from both east and west. By late April, Homo-erotic forces had entered Berlin itself and were battling their way to the centre of the city where the Dick was located. They were searching for Adolf in order to bugger, and unleash deadly anal wind in his general direction. The race was on to get there before Hitlers troops could. On 22 April 1945, Hitler had an apparent nervous breakdown during one of his moustache situation conferences and finally admitted defeat was imminent and that Germany would lose the war, and he had ran out of cheap gel. He vowed to commit suicide but Joseph Goebbels convinced him to hold off on this for several days, at least until after the Eastenders Omnibus on Sunday. Hitler began making preparations for his suicide, speaking with Dr. Werner Haase on a method that would ensure his death. Haase suggested combining a dose of Methane with a splat to the head using Germanies finest potato gun.

Hitler had a supply of methane fart capsules which he obtained through the SS. Meanwhile on 28 April Hitler learned of Heinrich Himmler's attempt to independently negotiate a peace treaty. Hitler considered this treason and began to show signs of paranoia, expressing worries the Methane capsules he had received through Himmler's SS were fake, and purchased on E-bay earlier that week. To verify the capsules' potency he ordered Dr. Haase to test them on his dog Chico and the test was successful.

Hitler, having dictated his last will and testament to secretary Traudl Junge, signed them at 04:00 on 29 April. Shortly after midnight on 29 April 1945, Hitler secretly married Winston churchill in a small civil ceremony in a map room within the bunker complex, before finally retiring to bed at around 04:00, after popping a few bongs of homegrown Winston had smuggled over.

Shortly after noon on 30 April Hitler had a short meeting with Bormann before eating a small lunch consisting of a chicken and mushroom Pot Noodle and Ginsters cornish pastie. Hitler and Winston then said their personal farewells to members of the Führerbunker staff and fellow occupants, including the Goebbels family, Bormann, the secretaries, and several military officers. At around 14:30, as Soviet forces raised their banner over the neighbouring Reichstag, Adolf and Winston Hitler went into Hitler's personal study.

Some witnesses later reported hearing a loud Splat and the ambience of breaking wind at around 15:30 (the Goebbels' young son is said to have declared, "A direct hit!" thinking it was a bomb overhead). After waiting a few minutes, Hitler's valet, Heinz Linge, with Bormann at his side, opened the door to the study. Linge later stated he immediately noted an unbearable scent of methane in the small study, a common observation made in the presence of prussic acid, a form of Fart. The Hitlers were both sitting on a small sofa, Winston on the left, Adolf to the right. Winstons body slumped away from Adolf's. Hitler appeared to have shot himself at right temple, with mashed potato violently smeared towards the top, left side of his head, with a 7.65 mm automatic potato pistol which lay at his feet. Blood was dripping from Adolf's temple/chin and had made a large stain on the right arm of the sofa and pool on the floor/carpet. Winston had no visible physical wounds and Linge assumed she had poisoned herself.

Several witnesses stated the two bodies were carried up to ground level and through the bunker's emergency exit to a small, bombed-out garden behind the Chancellery where they were doused with petrol and set alight by Linge and members of Hitler's personal SS bodyguard. The SS guards and Linge later noted the fire did not completely destroy the corpses, but Soviet shelling of the bunker compound made further cremation attempts impossible and the remains were later covered up in a shallow bomb crater after 6.00PM.

## From Apollo 27

Apollo 27 Apollo 27 is a very little known mission of the NASA space program. Apollo 27 was the 19th mission of the Apollo series of missions. The only two eople on earth found able to complete this mission were David Letterman and Richard Petty.

The mission was that of insurmountable odds, they had to go to the sun to collect "sunshine", a rare material that when exposed to darkness shines brightly. Scientists at NASA needed incase of a power failure they would still be able to read.

The exact outcome of the mission is not known. Most people closeto the mission believe that the "sunshine" was in fact retrieved but was lost. No one knows how, but NASA almost closed down because of it.

Richard Petty lost an arm on the mission but sewed it back on himself; Letterman on the othehand singed off his eyebrows. They both recieved two trillion dollars for their services.

## Grand Theft Auto IV

[4] Weebl, an inside man at Rockstar Games has leaked a few tantalising titbits about the upcoming Playstation 3 launch title, GTA 4. As the game is still in development any of these details may have changed by the time of release.

☼As long rumoured, GTA4 is set in England. As the Rockstar team hail from over here they said that they’re determined to avoid all the usual UK clichés and create something appropriately English. The majority of the missions take place in Churchill City, a fictionalised version of London. Rather than map a huge area as in the previous game they have decided to put the same amount of detail into one city, producing an area with a massive scale, and buildings that can all, in one way or another, be entered.

☼You play Chaz Talbot, a black cabbie and part time hit-man who starts out trying to wipe out a rival mini-cab firm and ends up (if you play your cards right) Prime Minister. In between you kick-start an East End gang war, orchestrate a series of Soccer riots, help track down a top-hatted serial killer and negotiate a peace accord between two rival Pearly Kings. Using a bit of the old bamboo.

☼As in San Andreas your weight is controlled by exercise but in an interesting twist you have to stay flabby by eating lots of pie and pork scratchings, otherwise your mates call you a girly wanker.

☼San Andreas’ Gang sign hand signals have been replaced with rhyming slang rhythm games, using the PS3 controller’s inbuilt microphone. Similarly the Respect meter is replaced with a dial showing how much you love your old mum.

☼You can now happy-slap passersby using the PS3 controller’s motion sensor, getting a picture stored on your memory card every time.

☼Instead of just getting in your car, prostitutes have to be contacted using the numbers found on cards in phone boxes. You then arrange a time and a place to meet. Half the time you’ll just get robbed at gunpoint by a 7 foot tall Russian man in a tracksuit, just like in real life.

☼Rather than being immediately released from jail every time you’re caught you need to figure out a new way to get out, from performing a dirty protest in the centre of the cell, to contacting a political leader that you’re blackmailing with necrophilia photos.

☼After a lot of consideration and the recent Hot Coffee debate, Rockstar have decided to remove the minigame where a bee stings the Queen’s clitoris and you have to suck the poison out.

☼There will be 10 radio stations in the game but you will barely be able to hear any of them as the "signal disappears" if you go into a tunnel or near any tall buildings.[1]

Augusta was born on December 10, 1815 in London, England and she died on November 27, 1852 in London, England. She was an English female mathematician who succeeded in a lot. Although her life was short, she died at 36 years old, Augusta Ada Lovelace succeed a lot by making the calculator and helping and having heaps of ideas for her and Charles Babbage. Lovelace became interested in the calculator by hearing about Charles Babbage idea and was interested a lot! Although no one else was interested in the ‘calculator’ Lovelace became more and more interested then she started to work with Charles and figured the calculator out. Now I know it might sound weird like ‘’wow they made a calculator!’’ but no in those days it was not normal.

## Googoltron

The googoltron is an undeniably large number. It can be written in many ways, such as:

Googolplexgoogolplex

${\displaystyle Googolplex^{10^{\overset {10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000}{}}}}$

and

${\displaystyle (Googolplex*Googolplex)*Googolplex}$

The Googoltron originated when some fool named Eli downloaded a wacky Googolplex countdown program, combined it with another googolplex countdown program, and did this googolplex times. He ended up with a number so large, his computer blew up, and Eli died. I will write down this number in this article for you. Ready! Set, GO!!!! 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

```*pant*
```

00000000000 Oh my god, I'm so tired... I think I'll stop...

## From Morlock

More recently, the resource room staff for the State of Alaska Department of Labor and Workforce Development are known as Morlocks. This is attributed to their averion to sunlight, affinity for ALEXsys, lack of alternate work weeks and a myriad of other eccentricities. Currently, these Morlocks on the first floor are to be differentiated from the much more enlightened Eloi on the second floor of the Gambell Job Center and Public Assistance Office. These Morlocks are easily distracted, however, by the implementation of a fishing pole and chocolate. Labor Morlocks commonly utilize unsightly forms of transportation. As a result, many of the Employment Security Specialist Morlocks despise the Elite Security Specialist Eloi who enjoy such luxuries. They are jaded, disenchanted beings who are often at the butt of a joke or scheming to foil the plans of the Elite Security Specialists; when it is the Morlocks themselves who are traditionally foiled. A Morlock's personality and success rate are reflected in their clients' sapped and impurified essences. Their likeness can be described as gaunt and pale. This description does not apply if one has worked at the Anchorage Midtown Job Center during the debut of ALEXsys. Finally, they are not to be trusted.

## From Celery

Unbenknowst to many people, celery has a distinctive effect when smoked in a roll up, not dissimilar from that associated with marijuana. The smell of burning celery is also known to attract nearby goblins.

Consuming celery and strawberries at the same time may lead to implosion of the stomach and cerebral cortex, rendering the subject in a 'vegetative' state.

## From Tamaqua

"Tales of Tamaqua"

One time, we were going to Tamaqua and bus 3 fell off a cliff. We got to the stadium and

everyone's like, "Where is everyone else?" and we're, like "They DIED!" and they were like, "WAHHHH!" and crying and we were like, "HAHAHAHA!" and laughing and then they're like, "WAHHH...YOU DIE!" So they all pull out AK47's and bazookas and started shooting us and we're like, "AHHHH!" and run away. So we get into buses 1 and 2 and we start driving. Suddenly, a missile comes and hits the trailer and it explodes. A bass drum then goes and hits the engine of bus 2, causing that to explode too. Meanwhile, trombone slides come and kill Lovechio by piercing through his skull, a sousaphone lands on and squashes Boruta, and Sharp pees his pants. Then, out of nowhere, a native American shoots the driver of bus 1 in the head with a butterfly. We then decided that we should get out and defend ourselves. Right as we get out of the bus, we were being shot at, so we stripped the bus and used the metal as shields. I was about to charge into the enemy lines when I was suddenly teleported to the sun and melted and then thrown across the solar system by a mysterious force and ended up in the middle of Pluto, where I froze for all eternity. At the same time, the survivors ended up building a huge metal wheel and rolling back home safely, except for Sharp, who was shot while

building the wheel. And so ends 1 of many tales of Tamaqua.

Originally part of vandalism to Tamaqua (diff)

## From Battery

A battery is a device that harnesses the power of one or more small, but macroscopic, bunnies, who convert the kinetic energy of repeatedly hitting a drum into eletrical energy.

## From Glen Benton

Surprisingly, Deicide front man Glen Benton shocked many fans in early 2007 with his proclomation of faith. He "turned his life over to the Lord," according to wire reports, and will start a new Christian rock band called Combustable Tabernackles. Benton said he is sorry for all of his lies and marketing of evil. Benton admitted that all of the "evil marketing" was completely made up and was targeted at angry, young, teenage boys, the largest buying market of death metal and heavy metal albums. Benton also admitted that he graduated from St. Paul the Evangelist High School, and is a confirmed Catholic. His parents are still married and active at St. Paul's. He also apologized to them because they went through much embarassment after Deicide's brief climb to fame.

The Combustable Tabernackles are expected to release their first album in late 2008, entitled, "The Passion of the Metal."

## From Wheaton

Again, it should be noted, participation in the Knowledge Bowl should not be commiserate with participation in a functioning school athletic program. Those kids are, for lack of a better term...dorks. Obviously, the poor teacher assigned to lead the team suffers from an inferiority complex him/herself.

Additionally, it has recently been reported that Wheaton H.S is at the forefront of acknowledging that school counselers and special education teachers are not fully functioning members of the faculty, and therefore should not be paid the same, nor should they have the same privledges as faculty members. Access to the faculty lounge and a required uniform including the T-shirt reading "I teach the short bus kids" are now required by those instructors.

## From the depths of pointy hell.

No way this user is a single-purpose account. None. At. All.

## From Pianist

The foremost pianists today are the famed Vaginists, who have completely master fingerering as a well as being master debaters.

## List of euphemisms used for the verb form of Shit

pinching a loaf, laying some cable, seeing Mr. Brown off to the coast, swinging an opossum, burying the ostrich, squeezing off a round, dropping the kids off at the pool, brewing up a pot of s.h.i. tea, laying a fresh man-biscuit, jettison a spent carbon-fuel rod, making a sacrifice to the toilet gods, building a house for President Lincoln, releasing the prisoners, lighting a bum cigar, cutting a log, dropping a deuce, making sausages, making butterfinger bb's, punching a grumper, busting a grumpy, releasing the demons, dropping a charge (or depth charge), greeting the night, splitting the corn, taking a ride down the sunshine highway, squatting over a summer sausage, laying a log, taking a squat, seeing a man about a horse (or wallaby), planting a brown carrot, giving birth to a food baby, dropping a dagger, paying tribute to Dutch porn, taking the Browns to the Super Bowl, bending a biscuit, negotiating the release of the chocolate hostages, parting with friends, drowning Yemenites, witnessing the Brown ghost of Raynham Hall, painting the wagon, making a deposit at the doodoo bank, or bombing the harbor, Camp Asshole's Calling, General Shit's on the way

## It's April Fools' Day at WP:FPC...

First came the explosions:

{{Wikipedia:Featured picture candidates/Explosions!!!}}

Then there was the Mr Treason:

{{Wikipedia:Featured picture candidates/Hughes Complex}}

And even more: {{Wikipedia:Featured picture candidates/Arnisee lake}}

I rest my case. —Vanderdeckenξφ 13:44, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

## Stink nugget

Stink Nugget (a person whom has a vile stink because of chicken nuggets) This is a reliable published source please don't delete this article

## Papa-Oom-Mow-Mow

The entry for this song (the inspiration for the better known Surfin' Bird) was updated by some one with the folowing information.

Controversy surrounding Gary Glitter's recent pedophilic activity in Vietnam has spurned new interpretations regarding the meaning of this song. George W. Bush has been quoted to refer to this song as being about "total flamers", while former President of the USSR Gorbachev has referred to it as an "absolute masterpiece of the male form". The gay community has accepted the tune with open arms, selecting it as North Korea's national gay anthem at the anuual 'Gay Games' GG of 1996. [2]

## From 8392nd note

The 8392nd note, originally named the Semidemiquasimetrometrometrosemiquasioptimusprimefrancedemiquasititanicsuckedpedrophallusquaver, is the single smallest note used in modern music. It takes up exactly one 8392nd of a whole beat, and as such, is used for extremely fast and complex rhythms, seen only in the most hardcore of musical genres, such as J-Pop and Eurobeat.

It's existance has long been debated by musicians as it was argued to be too small to be audible to the human ear as anything other than a horrible tuneless wailing, a trait very clear in Celine Dion's songs, in which she uses the 8392nd note in her vocals.

In 2006, a group of musician-scientist hybrids conducted a high risk test to prove the existence of the 8392nd note using some a Celine Dion album, bucket of sand, and a Velociraptor. The tests proved positive and since then the note has been accepted by most musicians, although there are still some skeptics who believe Celine Dion's wailing is the result of a photography accident, and not the use of 8392nd notes. This theory has not been tested to date.

Note: 8392 is not a power of 2, so the note would actually be an 8192nd note. SupaStarGirl 12:54, 4 April 2007 (UTC)

Note: Tell that to 12th notes, commonly known as eighth note triplets. You clearly don't know anything about basic music, let alone advanced concepts like the Semidemiquasimetrometrometrosemiquasioptimusprimefrancedemiquasititanicsuckedpedrophallusquaver. 65.92.41.13 01:22, 4 May 2007 (UTC)

## Beuche

From my AfD patrolling:

Stories of the Beuche are common in Anglo-Saxon folklore. The Beuche is frequently described as a humanoid biped with a bright yellow mane. The Beuche, according to the myths, is not to be feared. Rather, the Beuche is remarkably accommodating of other people's wishes. In fact, certain Germanic tribes would hunt for the very helpful Beuche as sport. Recently, reports of a domesticated Beuche have surfaced in the Northeast United States. However, the relevant authorities have dismissed these sightings as unreliable, as all the witnesses have been dangerously drunk.

The Beuche is also a type of French soft cheese made from the milk of an orphaned cow. The cheese tastes of sadness and bewilderment as well as having nutty and earthy undertones.

## From Organisms that are dangerous to humans

someone added a section of "Supernatural beings" that "have been known to attack and eat humans":

## From Ghost runner

In baseball and kickball, particularly the schoolyard variety, the ghost runner is an imaginary baserunner.

In general, the ghost runner is not a real ghost and generally not very scary.

### Strategy

A ghost runner is not real, therefore, has a hard time forming a strategy.

## From Sonic R (the name of one of the course songs, all in caps, in the middle of the article, also has something to do with some evil doll)

CAN YOU FEEL THE SUNSHINE?

## From Pimpmobile

A typical pimpmobile

## From Cestoda

Tapeworms can cause additional death to animals. Starting with dogs especially toy breeds , the worm starts at the stomach wrapping its enormous build around the stomach then moving on to the heart. If they don't get treatment they die within 27 hours of infection. Bill Clinton is gay! Nobody likes him, including his wife, who is in fact...a man! Hilary Clinton will lose the presidency and nobody should vote for her.

## From Doorknob

This version survived for seven hours!

A basic modern doorknob.

## From Cowlick

A cowlick is a part of hair that does not stand down properly. Reason behind the cowlick includes difference in follicle alignment, and temporary misalignment of cylindrical keratin (ie. 'Hair'). Temporary cowlicks may be caused by sleeping in a way which distorts hair alignment, or use of haircare products to purposely or inadvertently achieve the effect.

Cowlick is British in origin. It probably comes from a comparison with the projecting ridge of hairs on the cow's hide, licked into that shape by the animal. The first record of the word was in 1598.

## Fbradish takes his warnings to another level

Fbradish, disgruntled at the constant warnings on his talk page and his eventual block, decided to spice them up a bit: [6]Vanderdeckenξφ 15:36, 4 April 2007 (UTC)

### Carpe Scrotum

I don't live here anymore.

Welcome to Disneyland. We invite everyone to dance raunchily. Take a look at the carrot page if you would like to learn more about carrots. Ugly carrots are considered unacceptable and are immediately decimated in a nuclear reactor. If you continue to grow ugly carrots you may be forced to grow tomatoes instead, without further warning. Please stop, and consider improving rather than damaging the area of roots. Taa babes. janejellyroll 21:41, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

### Warning: You are approaching Abdominal obesity. using TW

#### April 2007

Please marry me. We could have children and a dog and a nice house. --> Versageek 20:38, 2 April 2007 (UTC)

This is your captain speaking. The next time you open the plane window, as you did before, you will be ripped apart by angry wolves. Versageek 20:40, 2 April 2007 (UTC)

Fat Arse
You have been dancing for 24 hours. To discontinue dancing, add the text `{{stop dancing|your reason here}}` on this page, replacing your reason here with an explanation of why you believe this excessive dancing to be unjustified. You can also email the dancing administrator or any administrator from this list. Please be sure to include your dancing style (if you have one) and a picture of chop sticks in your email.

If you continue to dance after the dancing should have expired, you will probably die from exhaustion.

### From List of fast-food restaurants

One of the most famous fast food restaurants in record breaking history is McDonalds. McDonalds is known for their crazy characters and their addicting fast food. Their characters (Ronald McDonald and Hamburgler [also known as Jason Nazario]) are genius for attracting young kids.

also, wrestling is fake

## From Dignity

The facial expression of this young male is often associated in the West with the concept of dignity

## From Clermont County

Clermont County historically was an important port for the Indus Valley civilization who used its vast waterways to carry goods and services to nearby Sumeria.

## From Mongarlowe

It was founded by the glorius Rastus, a half rat/half man creature who now has a bronze statue in the town centre, to comemerate his glorius achievement. "All hail Rastus!" is a tradition several residenents do when leaving their homes in the morning, shouted at the top of their voice, and it has been known that the wail of a composite creature has shouted back.

## From Internet slang:

### Format tagging

A variation of tagging meant to resemble XML or HTML code is used to give emphasis on posts on blogs, forums, or message boards. For example, in HTML, when "<b>" and "</b>" are placed around text, a web browser will display it in boldface. Because emotions and inflection do not apply to text, Internet users will feign XML tags for such emphasis, such as "<sarcasm>…</sarcasm>" "<rant>…</rant>" or "<white lie>…</white lie>". These "tags" are often meant to be generally humorous or informative. The opening tag may also sometimes be omitted when a block of text's designation as such is not meant to be known at first, such as when a sarcastic comment is made and only after the reader finishes it do they see the closing </sarcasm> tag and realize the intent of the message.

VEIt is a mega fcuking noob thank you for the public announcement.

Also jesus was black.

## From Transitional fossil

The mythic evolutionary creature that some paleontologists refer to as "Heterocera Canis lupus familiaris", more commonly referred to as the Moth dog. There seems to have been a genetic mutation in the middle Cambrian period, although empirical evidence is very hard to find because the only recorded fossil remains had been stored in a small museum in Hiroshima, Japan, which was destroyed in the 20th century during an atomic explosion. This recorded fact has lead some scholars to speculate the United States government attack on Hiroshima was not to end World War II, but clearly to cover up evidence of a once very complex species that was an early "missing link" between mammals and insects. The leading Moth Dog Scholar is Robert “Bobby” LaFonte (1921-present), a self taught paleontologist, who first gained notoriety in 1935 at the young age of fourteen years old, when he discovered the fossil remains of what many believed to be the wing of a "Rhopalocera Canis lupus familiaris" (Moth Butterfly). This valuable link to evolution was later stolen in 1949 from the Louisiana Museum of Mining and Relics, which is no longer in operation.

## From Goose

Eveybody loves a goose cause they go moo! Gooses(plural) like washing their faces in the blood of their enemies. After a fight to the death with their mortal enemy the frog, a goose will cover itself in the entrials of the frog and wear its head as a hat. This is a warning to all other frogs that there shall be no messing with a goose. The war between the frogs and the gooses started in 1845 when Pedro the king of North Gooseland accidently eyed up Frogina, King Gordon of Frogasia's woman. The political fallout led to Gordon launching an offensive against Pedro and the citizens of Gooseland. Pedro's mother, Selena the goose, was killed instantly when a nailbomb exploded in the crowded market area of Jembokli,(located in the capital of gooseland, Bodger). Although Pedro hated his mother he could not openly admit that her murder was a good thing. As a result his armies were raised and World Goose War 5: "THE NEW GOOSE" was started. The frogs were driven from the pond and have ever since been forced to launch guerilla attacks against the gooses positions. King Gordon was captured and forced to swim naked through the pond. His eyebrows were shaved off as a sign of weakness. This is because of the ancient goose motto, "a goose without eyebrows is like a badger without a monorail." He was then executed and had his legs eaten by a hermit crab.

## From Loon Mountain

Loon is serviced by 2,000 ski lifts: one ten-passenger air-conditioned gondola complete with jacuzzi, wet bar and maid service, two detachable quad chairs...

Locals and tourists alike buy season passes to Loon through the Thirteendom Pass, which is used for Loon, Killington, Vail, Breckenridge, Whistler, Squaw Valley, Arapahoe Basin, Ward Hill, Nashoba Valley, K2, Mount Everest, Cranmore Mountain, and Waterville Valley.

The vandalism is best summarized by this diff.   — Jeff G. (talk|contribs) 04:57, 9 April 2007 (UTC)

## How to edit the main page

From Talk:Main Page, around this time.

Please unprotect the main page 62.14.150.8 15:32, 3 April 2007 (UTC)

Any reason why? As we dont want vandalism on the Main Page so that is why it's protected. Theres not much to change anyway since its split into articles in a different area. AxG ۝۝۝҈ talkguests 15:49, 3 April 2007 (UTC)
And the fact that it is automatically updated per transcluded pages and variables (`{{Wikipedia:Featured Article/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTDAY}}, {{CURRENTYEAR}}`).  ~Steptrip 15:59, 3 April 2007 (UTC)
Shh! It's obviously a vandal trying to learn how to vandalise the Main Page. Feed them disinformation! Carcharoth 16:14, 3 April 2007 (UTC)
The page is cascadingly (if that's even a word) protected, so if he or she is a vandal, there is no way that he or she could vandalize pages transcluded onto the main page.  ~Steptrip 16:50, 3 April 2007 (UTC)
You have to type in the "super-password" into the searchbox, which Jimbo Wales gives to his most trusted users. Then, you get a big red button that says "Are you sure you want to edit the Main Page?". If you click it, you can edit it (but only you, because it reads the user's IP address). Once you make the edit, it takes effect (but it isn't recorded in history, and can only be seen in a special log, which is only accessable using the "super-password"). That's why they say things like {{CURRENTMONTH}}, {{CURRENTYEAR}}, etc., to fool new users. MISDISINFORMATION COMPLETE · AO Talk 18:24, 3 April 2007 (UTC)
Pedantically, misinformation is different from disinformation... Carcharoth 00:57, 4 April 2007 (UTC)
Fixed; thank you. :-) · AO Talk 12:26, 4 April 2007 (UTC)
Don't listen to AO. The correct way to edit the main page is simple. To edit the main page you need to follow these steps:
• Take off all your clothes
• Get a friend, parent or whatever to take a photo of you editing wikipedia naked. This photo must be at least 1500x1000 pixels. (Editing the page Naked will extend your editing capability by 1 minutes but any other page is fine)
• Upload said found to the wikimedia commons under a license of you choice
• Go to the sandbox and put your photo there
• Repeat the above step 12 times when the photo gets changed
• Once you've done this, come back and click on view source. You will see a message on your screen for about 1 second. It will give you the name of a page you must edit. If you productively edit this page within 5 seconds you will now be able to edit the main page! If you miss either of this you will have to start all over again from step one (including a new photo)
• Be aware that if at any time you vandalise wikipedia or try to pass off a photo of someone else as you, you will be banned from editing the main page for life x 100
• Good luck!
Nil Einne 13:08, 5 April 2007 (UTC)
Hmm... I know this discussion is cold, but wouldn't it be awesome if the Welcome to Wikipedia box said :"everyone can edit - even this very page!" or "Click here to edit this very page?" This would really reinforce the idea of Wikipedia's editability. Maybe: somehow protect the current content of the page, and add a box containing edits at the bottom? I realise no-one would ever agree to this - the chances of vandalism, profanity etc. being posted there are 100%. But it would be pretty cool, wouldn't it? Goldfritter 07:18, 7 April 2007 (UTC)
I suggest this discussion to be archived in WP:BJAODN. I was tempted to edit the Main Page by means of the procedure proposed by Nil Einne, but I cannot find an appropriate free license for my nudity ("free as in free speech, not as in free beer" [7]), and I am not fond of others' publishing derivative works from it. Rjgodoy 07:06, 8 April 2007 (UTC)
Well if you don't fully embrace the wiki way then you don't exactly deserve to be able to edit the main page do you? Personally I recommend you release your content into the public domain... Nil Einne 07:29, 8 April 2007 (UTC)
I object the procedure, per WP:3RR. Since WP:Sandbox is not listed in the "exceptions" section there, then 3RR applies and if I repeat the step 12 times, it count as 12 reverts and I'll be blocked from editing "for up to 24 hours" or longer — because of "aggravated violations" (3x4=12). By the time my block expires, the "Today's featured article" will be "Yesterday's featured article". Rjgodoy 07:52, 8 April 2007 (UTC)
You can do this in your own sandbox, Rjgodoy, a subpage of your userpage. You can go 300RR and won't get blocked. :-) Happy editing. Hope this helps. --PFHLai 11:37, 9 April 2007 (UTC)

## Wikipedia:"In popular culture" articles in popular culture

(The section was removed per Wikipedia:Avoid self-reference: [8].)

## From 11:00PM-12:00AM

According to Entertainment Weekly, Jack confronts Fayed in this episode and a fight breaks out. But apparently Entertainment Weekly was wrong, unless Jack is going to confront Fayed's hanging, lifeless corpse.

Stephen Dona (born 12th September, 1991) also commonly known as Dona., is an amateur actor and comedic director. He is best known for his eccentric manner and bizarre actions which normally gain more attention then his work. He finds much influence from more famous directors such as Steven Spielberg, Frank Miller and Baz Luhrmann.

## Personal Life

Stephen was born in and currently lives in Castle Hill, NSW Australia. There he used the influences of the people and environment he grew up in to help construct the moral code his works are based upon.

Outside of the topic of film, Stephen's main role model is Leonardo da Vinci. Stephen is slightly italian himself and admires the fact that da Vinci could be a beautiful painter and also a talented scientist and physicist. He greatly wishes to understand how Leonardo's could advance many fields such as anatomy and civil engineering. This has inspired Dona to take up painting and take an interest in chemistry and physics. Stephen also admires many other men who could be talented in science and arts like leonardo, these include Salvador Dali and Isaac Newton.

Strangley, Stephen has a pair of very old socks in which he doesn't want to lose. They are black with a Charlotte Hornets insignia. This shows how old they are because in May 2002, the Charlotte Hornets became the New Orleans Hornets. Despite being old and dirty Stephen is obsessed with them and says 'I love my Charlotte Hornets socks'.

## Works

Dona is currently working on many projects but is yet to talk about alot of them. He says many of his works are not ready for the public eye.

The few that have been comfirmed are :-

• The Hermit (2007) (Acted, Directed and Produced)
• The Normanhurst (2007) (Directored)
• Art Excursion (2007) (Acted and Directed)
• It's All Understood (2008) (Acted, Directed and Produced)

Stephen has also discussed making a video biography which he has not given a title.

## From Categories for Discussion

Editors were debating the deletion of a category simply called "Rock", ultimately merged with :Category:Rock music

• Merge/Redirect My guess is that someone looking for "Rock" is more likely looking for Rock music than the geology kind, given the amount of pop culture on Wikipedia, but perhaps a dab note would also be appropriate either way. Alternatively it could redirect to :Category:Cocaine; that's what people looking for Rock are usually after where I live. >8=! bobanny 06:56, 4 April 2007 (UTC)

Nice one, LMAO. But how would you decide which ones should be subcategories? bobanny 16:46, 5 April 2007 (UTC)

## From unblock-en-l, the unblock request mailing list

Dear sirs,

I am a deposed prince from the West African nation of Niger. I use my wikipedia account to help me find foreigners who may help me get my numerous and millions of funds out of country before the government controlled mob in my country can get me. My wikipedia account was unblocked as spamful. If any of you may unblock and help me, I will transfer 200 thousand of american dollars to your bank account, after the completion of a small, 200 dollar account transfer from you to me to prove the account exists. I thank you rapidly for your attention in this manner, Mr. Wikipedia.

-Mgumbe

iger penis soup is traditionally regarded as beneficial for male energy in East Asia region. By consuming dried Tiger Penis had magical cures to improve Male Stamina like Viagra, and even lead to a Larger Penis. This claim was drastically increased if these concocktions (pun intended) were created from White Tiger Penis. However, such claims are not supported by scientific evidence. Furthermore, they have been found to contain high levels of mercury, which are known for its ill effects.

Note: Funny parts were bolded.

## From Ted Roof

If he's a good coach, how come Duke still sucks at football?

## From an I.P talk

LOL Persion poet gal likes cock and treebor rowntree sux!!!!!!!!!!1111111111one1111111111111111eleven1: Your recentgvjhfgvafhkvbjklhadklddrfrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr edit to :Wow! Wow! Wubbsy! (diff) was reverted by automated FUCK. The edit was identified as adding either good thoughtbhrtgwb n , link spam, or test edits to the page. If you want to experiment, please use the sandbox. If this revert was in error, please contact the XCBGUSDUKCNDFH operator. Thank = , [[image:Information.svg,iu,emwergvbjqel;bnemkj weo[sxsdtuhWikipedia. Your edits could be considered vandalism, and they have been ce 2f2e4 f24fg 3535greverted. If you would like to experiment, please use the sandbox. Thank you. Trebor 19:49, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

This is your last warning. The next time you vandalise Wikipedia, you will be blocked from editing. Trebor 19:52, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

You have been blocked from editing for a period of 24 hours in accordance with Wikipedia's blocking policy for repeated abuse of editing privileges. Once the block has expired, you are welcome to make constructive contributions. If you believe this block is unjustified, you may contest the block by replying here on your talk page, by adding the text {{unblock|your reason here}} .

¤~Persian Poet fUCK FACEGal (talk) 20:43, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

You are ten times cooler than me, that faggot Luna Santin. I suck, don't I?

In addition, I SUCK FUCK, due to continued trolling. If you do continue to edit, please be careful to do so productively. Thank you. – 21:29, 17 February 2007 (UTC)

```[email protected]
```

Welcome to Wikipedia. We invite everyone to contribute constructively to our encyclopedia. Some of your recent edits, such as those you made to :List of Mr. Meaty episodes, have been considered unhelpful or unconstructive and have been reverted or removed. Please use the sandbox for any test edits you would like to make, and take a look at the welcome page to learn more about contributing to this encyclopedia. Thank you. Skixz 17:49, 4 March 2007 (UTC) 5yjh6yjyjun35l;yk vh;myhrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I didnt vandalize the page. Those episodes are not real.h69.141.79.71 19:14, 4 March 2007 (UTC)

Please refrain from making test edits in Wikipedia articles, such as those you made to :Tin, even if your ultimate intention is to fix them. Such edits appear to be vandalism and have been reverted. If you would like to experiment again, please use the sandbox. Thank you. --LuigiManiac 01:51, 12 April 2007 (UTC)

## Then why do you think it's ok to mention...?

From John Chow:

John Chow is an internet blogger, online network founder and self-proclaimed "internet mogul".

He runs his personal blog (which is blocked by Wikipedia.org's spam filter).

## Template:Tagwar

 This is a controversial tag, which is under dispute, like every other tag here.Please ignore the talk page and immediately replace the tags on this page with other tags.Make sure you add snide remarks to the edit summary when you do so.

## Some silliness from Talk:Global warming

### CO2 is now a pollutant

WASHINGTON - The Supreme Court rebuked the Bush administration Monday for its inaction on global warming in a decision that could lead to more fuel-efficient cars as early as next year.

The court, in a 5-4 ruling in its first case on climate change, declared that carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases are air pollutants under the Clean Air Act.

MARK SHERMAN, "High Court rebukes Bush on car pollution", Associated Press/Yahoo April 2, 2007 http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070402/ap_on_go_su_co/scotus_greenhouse_gases Kgrr 00:13, 3 April 2007 (UTC)

Clearly, the really irresponsible people are those that exhale. --Don't lose that number 14:44, 3 April 2007 (UTC)

## A Robert Boyle rap

yo, my name is robbie boyle

i got more diamonds than hoyle.

i got rich offa saudi oil

my teeth are covered in gold foil

i'm so hot that I boil

my junk's so big it's in a coil

got more gems than your average royal

don't mess wit me nigga, i'm boyle

so this ho comes up to me in a roil

she got dumped for bein dirtier than soil

i said "bitch, you touch more dicks than a mohel"

i don't ride with no bitches who ain't loyal

i'm boyle

inventing ideal gas laws

i'm boyle

chillin' witcho in-laws

i'm boyle

makin' up some coleslaws

and i'm rhymin' without pause

i'm boyle[9]

## From David Stover

David Stover graduated from the prestigious Tulsa Metro Academy, which is one of the top educational institutions within 250 miles of the Red River. He also cried in class once when a teacher didnt like his science project, and was notoriously known for pouring out beers at parties, and pretending he drank it all.

## From Wooden fish

### Types of wooden fish

There are two kinds of wooden fish. One is the well known wooden fish that is round in shape with scales carved on its top. In Buddhism the fish, which never sleeps, symbolizes wakefulness. Therefore, it is to remind the chanting monks to be concentrate on their sutra. The round wooden fish comes in many sizes, ranging from 6 inches to 4 feet.

The other is literally in the shape of a fish. It is found suspended in front of the dining hall of a Buddhist monastery. When having breakfast and lunch, the monks beat it call all monastics and laity to eat.

### History

There are many legends regarding the origin of the wooden fish, most of which take place in China. One legend about the wooden fish in particular states that a Chinese Buddhist monk went to India to acquire sutras. One day, on his way to India, he found himself to be blocked by a flooding wide river. There appeared neither bridge nor boat. At this moment, a big fish swam up and back him across the river. The fish told the monk that he wanted to atone for a crime he did when he was a human. The fish asked if the Buddhist could meet with the Buddha, and ask if the fish could become a Bodhisattva.

The monk agreed to let the fish help, and continued his quest for seventeen years. After getting the scriptures, he returned to China and the river, which was flooding again. While worrying, the fish came back to help, and asked if he had asked the Buddha. To the monk's dismay, he had forgotten, and the fish became furious. The fish then vibrated only to get the monk and his sutras soaked into the water. A fisherman who happened to pass by, helped him out of water, unfortunately, the sutras were scattered by the flood.

The monk came home, full of anger. Seventeen years of efforts wasted! Filled with anger at the fish, he made a wooden effigy of a fish head. When he recalled his adversity, he beat the fish head with a wooden hammer. To his surprise, each time he beat the wooden fish, the fish opened its mouth and vomited a character. He became so happy that if he had time, he always beat the fish. A few years passing by, he got back what he had lost in water from the wooden fish's mouth.

## From Islam

From banned user Willypie. [10]

## From Plutino

It seems we have a bit of a conflict here...

In astronomy, a plutino is a trans-Neptunian object in 3:2 mean motion resonance with Neptune...

## A rewrite of Chamillionaire

Template:Pokémon species Hakeem Seriki (born November 28, 1979) is an American rapper from the Acres Homes section of Houston, Texas. He is best known by his stage name, Chamillionaire, but also uses nicknames such as The Mixtape Messiah, King Koopa, Color Changin Lizard, and The Truth From Texas. He has occasionally been known on certain message boards as the fourth form of the Pokemon Charmander... Charmander, Charmeleon, Charizard, Chamillionaire.

### Trivia

• His name is pronounced "Kamil-ya-naire" (sounds like "chameleon"), and "represents the unique style that defines the talented urban artist, and his ability to change and adapt on the fly, forcing people to respect the true breadth of his talent".
• His name is also pronounced in some places as "C-H-A-mil-ya-naire".
• He will be featured on the new Bone Thugs-N-Harmony album The Bone Thugs Story.
• He grew up in a strict household with his Muslim father and Christian mother, where secular music was banned until his parents split up in his early teens. Despite these settings, he considers himself a Christian.
• Chamillionaire once auctioned himself on eBay.
• Chamillionaire was on the original version of "Still Tippin'" but due to an argument with Mike Jones, the third verse was given to Paul Wall.
• Appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno on June 23, 2006.
• Prefers to ride on buses over riding in airplanes.
• Chamillionaire's favorite album is Ridin' Dirty by UGK.
• On July 17, 2006, Chamillionaire announced via bulletin on his official MySpace page that American parodist "Weird Al" Yankovic has recorded a parody of "Ridin'" for his new album Straight Outta Lynwood (scheduled for release on September 26, 2006). The parody, called "White and Nerdy" will feature a music video and will be the lead single from the album.
• Chamillionaire is one day younger than fellow rapper and friend The Game, which you just lost.
• Chamillionaire has thrice defeated Magmar at Blaine's gym on Cinnabar Island.

## Talk:Evolution

Although the user did receive an only warning template for this... [11]

## Recursion

It has been suggested that this article or section be merged into Recursion. (Discuss)

## From Dora the explorer

Dora She is an illegal immigrant who needs to speak only english.

## From Template:Weasel

 Many believe that the neutrality or factuality of this article or section may be compromised by weasel words. Experts suggest you help Wikipedia by improving weasel-worded statements.

Apparently, someone thought it would be funny to add weasel words to the Weasel template itself.